amoral 12 - one bad turn

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I took a sip of my beer and placed it next to my sketchpad.  Only a small sip as I was not yet willing to have more than one drink, not willing to risk social behaviour which is just too risky with this social disease.  Even on this, the twelfth of my Tuesday afternoon visits to Aesop’s Playground, finest public house south of the river.  The pub was the same as usual, the same people as usual.   Some days visits it has felt strange seeing the same patrons in the same seats week after week but this week it felt reassuring in the light of the unrest in the news.  Aesop behind the bar.  The old man at the counter.  The table of three in the back.  The crowded booth.  The kids in the middle and the youngsters near the door.  Martha had told me a story or two about Ant and Edie but looking at the table I would not have thought of them as a couple.  Edie was looking sullenly into her lap, probably looking at her phone though I cannot see.  Ant was engrossed in the story the other woman at the table was telling.  From her look I would say she was the arty type, impulsive and loud.  But my eyes were drawn back to Thornton, he is enegmatic.  He was listening to the story but passing an eye over the pub.  I guess that is how it is when you are as good looking as he is.

I was looking towards the door so I noticed their outlines before they came into the pub.  They must have just met at the door for he leaned to greet her with a kiss, though I only knew it was James and Martha when they opened the door to the pub.  Martha smiled and waved at me, scanning with James hovering behind her.  She came sat with me while James went to the bar.
“You didn’t open your sketch book today, Thornton not inspiring you today?”
“Well, actually I was thinking about how the woman with the black hair is telling Ant a story but that Edie seems put out by it.”
“Oh, I could tell you what all that is about, it is really quite a good story, definitely worth buying me a drink for.”
I did well not to respond by asking for the story.
“I would have to stand in line, it appears James is already buying you a drink.”
“Of course, a little deferment only intensifies the pleasure.”
Her flirtatious comment was too much for me.  I sat quietly staring at my sketch pad.
“I was thinking maybe it would be a good idea to capture the Afgan crisis in a sketch that would remind people how they felt today.  I mean, in a couple months when the refugees get here no one will remember how they wanted to help.”
Martha took the change of conversation in her stride, that is what makes her special, the flirting with me is a bonus.
“Yeah, it is true.  I guess that is the problem with the transient nature of social media.  We can’t keep an image in mind for longer than a few minutes.”
“Not like the old days when they painted in oils on the church walls.”
“Yeah, but how many people lived within a couple miles of the church.”
“That is an interesting idea, painting Insta pictures in Cathedrals.  Which pictures would you choose?”
“Oh, definitely whats-her-names buttocks.”
“Now James, no need to lower the tone.”
“We were talking about the Afgan crisis.”
“One bad turn.”
“Deserves another.”
“No, I meant I had turned the conversation badly.”
“Are you sure you were not suggesting an Aesop’s fable.”
I sat quietly listening to the conversation bounce between the them, I was hoping Martha would tell a little erotic story woven about an Aesop’s fable as had become the tradition of our Tuesday afternoon drinks, but I wanted to talk a bit more about the situation.  And about my feeling of inadequacy, or impotency.  The feeling that my actions would have no effect of consequence.  The feeling that I would be the multitude of butterflies who do not cause a storm on the other side of the world.  And so I sat quietly listening to my companions.
“I always liked that one because it is quite playful the way the fox offers soup to the crane in a flat bowl leaving the crane hungry, then instead of being angry the crane gets even by serving soup in a tall jug, too long for the foxes stubby snout.  Creative revenge, that is what I like.”
“Yes, it is always good when a tale has a little twist.  Even better if it is an every day story.”
“Perhaps a Tuesday story.”
“Indeed, a Tuesday story would be a fine one for a little twist in the end.  Indeed I have one with a little twist, with a pair of bad turns in it too, one that leads to the other.”
“What a delight, would it by any chance be a little tale someone from this very pub, from Aesop’s Playground, may have whispered to you one quiet evening?”
“Indeed it was, and not only that, I just mentioned, or alluded to, to be more accurate, this very little tale while you were getting the beers."
"Oh indeed, I am intreagued." 
"Ah, so shall I tell it to you?”
“Indeed, it would be the right thing to do.”
“Well then.  Not long ago Thornton was partaking in an afternoon drink with Edie and Ant, pretty much as they are now, though a little later in the day, when he informed them he was on his way to, how shall I say, a livelier pub to meet a few mates and would they like to come.  Sure, why not, no need to stop drinking now, yeah.  Well, he added a little later what he meant by livelier, there would be a wet t-shirt contest.  He was pretty sure Ant would enjoy it but he thought he would just see how it played out with Edie, it isn’t really her thing.  The reaction was a little underwhelming so he added for Edie’s benefit there would also be a wet pants contents.  Well, Edie replied, if a friend of mine were going to be entering a wet pants contest I would most certainly want to support him.  Thornton laughed, one bad turn, and he agreed.
“So it was that a few pints later they found themselves seated at a table against the wall of a busy pub, a pub getting busier.  Edie and Ant sat with their backs against the wall, Thornton’s friends chatted to themselves.  Thornton was at the end of the bar waiting to register his interest when his eye caught that of a woman with short dark hair.  She smiled.  This is the quietest part of the bar.  It seems so long since those days of waving your hand for service at bar counter three deep.  Yes, but it is only free drinks on this side.  Thornton smiled.  I can get you one but you have to sign up with me.  She took her time to reply.  So, we are going to see your pants, are we.  Thornton had an idea.  Sure, and see that large table along the end, I’ll make sure every one of them cheers for you.  She looked in his eyes with her most serious expression.  If that is a promise I will do it. 
“When Thornton told the table a minute later Edie responded one bad turn.
“As the anointed hour approached the crowds filled the the spaces.  When the call came for the contestants there was barely enough space for Thornton to find his way to the bar.  The crowd reflected the constitution of their table, many more men than women.  Groups of male friends and some mixed groups, no groups which were entirely women.  I am not quite sure how I feel about that.
“Fifteen minutes later a rather large drag queen with a flowery dress, bouffant blond hair and heels to die for, or to die in, stepped onto the stage.  Her baritone voice rang out capturing the audience with insults and promise.  She welcomed each of the contestants, now all wearing identical white shirts, and half wearing identical tight white boxers, onto the stage with a simple question which required a one word answer.  And a comment to keep the audience lightly entertained until there were twelve contestants on the stage with the drag queen and two bouncers, one male one female, each holding a large bottle of water.   Six men on the one side.  Six women on the other.  The drag queen inspected each of the contestents as if it were a military parade.  Demanding they stand with their hands behind their back she lifted their shirts with a little stick commenting on their stomachs with some rude and lewd innuendos and a clear preference for young Thornton.  One or two early male nipple flashes got the crowd going.
"The men were first to be dowsed.  Two of the men were as fine looking as Thornton.  They danced together and both of them had their shirts off at the first opportunity, and the crowd whooped.  Ant told me he was surpised by how genuine the cheers for the male nudity was as when he first surveyed the crowd he had not judged them as appreciating male nudity.  Edie maintained they were simply cheering the men because the women were to follow, and any encouragement may be rewarded later.  Two of the men were on the chubbier side, they did not take off their shirts, rather they kept lifting them away from their bodies mistakenly believing if their paunches were not pressing against the wet material would make the audience forget their love handles.  Both of them, in turn, danced excessively energetically.  The fifth man was a beanpole who, even before the water, was clearly the largest of the lot.  He barely danced rather slowly turning his massive phallus clearly visible through the trancelucent wet material to the left then to the right.  Thornton was last.  He worked the crowd the best, smiling and pointing out people, teasing the bouncer as she poured water on him, gyrating his hips as in a mymicary of female erotica and teasingly stripping down to his pants.  Their table went wild for him.
"The men were each given a towling robe and the women took their turn.  The first two were clearly dancers, they both were wearing tight shorts, they both had moves, dancing moves rather than seductive moves as Thornton had.  Each in turn, they both wowed the crowd with their physics and their skills.  Then came a pair who danced together.  They stood still for the bouncer as he poured water over their tops, and as the music came on their dancing was with each other rather then to the audience.  Like women dancing about the ubiquitous handbag.  Then was the turn of a chunkier woman who clearly loved the audience but was not much of a dancer.  Hers was the only woman's top that came off in the first round, though she seemed at a loss of what to do once she had cupped her breasts for the audience.  She started unzipping her jeans but did not strip them down, possibly because the music faded out.  Finally came the short dark haired beauty Thornton had pointed out to them, and their table went wild.  Edie thought Ant had whistled a little too fervantly, but Ant shrugged to say it was just the mood of the moment.    From the stage she responded well to their addulation and much of her dance was directed at their table including a flash of her nipples though her top remained on.
"The women were given towling robes and the performers all left the stage to enjoy their champagne in the VIP area while the drag queen invited the audience to refresh their glasses in anticipation of the second act.  Ant chuckled when retelling the memory of this being the only pub he had been to with a queue at the men's but not at the women's.  Edie rolled her eyes.
"The drag queen gave them plenty of time to get in a drink or two before starting the second act, it seemed quite a bit of champagne had been drunk in the VIP area as the contestents were noticably tipsier.  The drag queen announced a change to in the format, dancers would be coming on stage in pairs, the pair with the loudest cheer would win the prize.  Thornton said all the women had spent the interval trying to convince him to pair with them, but he stuck to the one he had met at the bar.
"First on was one of the dancers with the beanpole.  Once they were both suitably wet she danced about him almost as if he were the pole in her poledance.  She stripped off his shirt and his pants and he held his hips forward letting his cock sway dramatically.  Second was a foursome with the two pairs, the men stripping off their pants almost immediately, the women keeping up by stripping off their shirts.  But that was the highlight of their performance as from then on they resorted to dancing by themselves.  Then can one of the chubby men with the topless woman.  The chubby man kept to the side with his jazzy hands pointing towards the woman who, once again, was not dancing.  Once she had cupped her breasts she unzipped her jeans again, the zip went all the way down to her crotch and back up her bum so her jeans could split in two.  But no matter how long the music played she did not seem to manage to finish unzipping.  Perhaps coyness, perhaps a wardrobe malfunction.  Then came the other dancer and the other chubby bloke.  She danced about him and he was more handsy with her.  Their performance turned into his trying to undress her and her playfully slapping him away while dancing about him.  Finally came the short dark haired beauty with Thornton.  They were fabulous, teasing each other, flashing each other with mock horror expressions, flashing the audience to the other's mock horror.
"When the cheers were counted, the dancer wrapped about the beanpole got a loud cheer.  The foursome a louder cheer as the men swung their pricks in circles and the women bent to pull down their pants and flash their arses.  The topless woman once again unzipped but only got a small cheer.  The dancer let the chubby man catch her and hift her top but her flash only got a small cheer.  The short dark haired beauty and Thornton took turns in flashing while the other pointed.  First he flashed his cock, then she flashed her boobs.  They got a loud cheer too.  
"The second round of cheers only involved three groups.  First the dancer who remained handsy on the naked beanpole, second the foursome repeating their cock helicopters and naked arses and finally the short dark haired beauty pointed to Thornton who stripped for a cock helicopter and then he pointed while she bent over for a full monty from the rear.  It was not enough.  The cheer for the foursome was easily the loudest, right from the moment the two men had stepped on stage they had been the favourites.
"And so a fun evening was had by all, when Thornton returned to the table they left for a quieter venue as they all wanted something to eat.
"But what about the twist in the tail.  Well, a few days later at work a new colleague joines, she is none other than the short dark haired beauty, whom, I am sure you have guessed by now is none other than Erika sitting over there.  And by now you must have guessed why Ant always listens intently to Erika's annecdotes while Edie barely pays them any attention."
"Illuminating."
"Yes.  Thank you so, both of you.  Will you be staying for another?"
"Oh yes, will you join us?"
"NO, I think I better not.  But you have given me so much to think about until next week, same place same time."
"'Till then."
 

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